Wednesday, November 2, 2011

I won't be here for that.

Soundtrack:  Nicki Minaj featuring Rihanna- "Fly"

My work visa arrived!!! It's sooo pretty, all shiny and official!!!
I'm not sure if you can tell, but I'm pretty excited. I wanted to take a picture to show everyone, but thought better of it, as there is information I don't think would be smart to post...

Needless to say, this is really happening...I'm moving to New Zealand for a year. It hasn't hit me yet. In my mind I still have a ton of things I need to do before I pack and leave, though I know the time will be here quickly and before I know it I will be at the airport waving goodbye. But it hasn't hit me yet.

That is not to say it hasn't hit those I am leaving behind. They are starting to realize I will be gone after Thanksgiving. They won't be able to count on me to complete a project after that, be able to work a random day, or even meet up for coffee. As it stands right now, they are more upset about this than I am. Then again, I could be in denial.

I do have moments when I think "Oh, I won't be here for that." These times come about mainly when I'm watching a movie preview or TV show. I don't know why it occurs to me then, even I think it's weird that it does. You would think these thoughts would come about while talking to friends and family, co-workers about upcoming projects...those things don't bother me. In fact, I'm kinda looking forward to no being home for Christmas. Now that really makes me sound weird, but here's the explaination (and I think you will agree). Chrsitmas is a stressful time, not for me mainly, but for just about everyone around me. People are rushing after work to the stores to purchase gifts, wrapping and tagging those gifts so they can be given to the right person, and making plans in the rest of their limited spare time to party with friends and family. There are meals to be organized and prepared and end of year projects that need to be completed. And just about every year I build everything up in my head and get disappointed in some way or another.

But not this year. This year I am not making any plans. I'm not buying any gifts (sorry family, you'll just have to do without). I'm not cooking anything or attending any holiday parties. And I'm perfectly fine with that.

At least in my state of denial I am.

1 comment:

  1. Or you will be creating your own traditions cooking a dinner for yourself and some of the new friends yiu wil meet. The reality of the situation is you wont be here for that... But you will be there for that which ultimately has a little bit of this in it. I will miss you and be joyous for you at the same time. Xoxo